Everything

That's what I go to school for...

2007-06-16T20:53:00.001-01:00

Why does it seem that every time I write something on my blog, I always begin with an apology for the delay in between postings? It's fairly warranted this time though - it's pushing two months since I last logged in and posted up a few random bits and bobs. Still, I shouldn't be sorry - after all, this is me we're talking about, and I am really slack sometimes...

So. What has been happening in the wonderful world of idlemichael? Well, as always, my course is a dominant factor in my life - however, the good news is that it's drawing to a close. Come July 13th this year, I will officially be a Newly Qualified Teacher, with a certificate and everything. There's a graduation ceremony to attend, which will be... interesting. Despite going to university, I never went to the event there - I was in quite a pissed off place, my family was in the process of imploding, and I spent graduation day in the pub from 10am. My classmates found me sleeping under the pool table at around 2pm after they'd finished - I of course was a little drunk already, and decided that a nap was in order, and the landlord was so used to having me and my friends there that he let me be. I don't think the same will occur this time - after all, I am older and wiser this time. Apparently. There will be a going out session though, and Kate - my GTP colleague - has insisted that we will be drunker than ever before. I'm looking forward to it!

I finished my final Teaching Practice last week. Six weeks of having your every move scrutinised, every lesson plan graded, and everything you do questioned. Believe me - it's really annoying. "Why did you do this?" "What effect did that have?" "What were you trying to achieve?" GAAAAAAAAAH I DUNNO, I JUST WANT TO TEEEEEACH! Mercifully I didn't have a freakout of that nature with anyone, and the whole six weeks went well. No failed observations, and many good write ups from students and teachers alike. On top of that, somehow I managed to swing a job for the new school year as well... and it's in the school I'm training in, which means there'll be no horrible transition phase, no having to learn the ways of a new place (and all the children's names!) and - best of all - no vast array of new and disgusting illnesses. Brilliant.

Of course, life isn't all school (though reading this blog would probably convince you otherwise). Other exciting things have happened, including me having a reasonably nasty smash on my bike. Nothing major, just a bit of cosmetic damage on the front of The Pig and a rather impressive selection of bruises pretty much all over my body. In fact, I still have a few scars on my leg from where I scraped it along the road, and we're talking a good three weeks ago now. However, I believe that chicks dig scars, so it's alright ;)

The mighty Joypod has finished it's first series - I am seriously impressed that me and elmo managed to put a solid ten episodes together, to be honest. It's been very well recieved, and I'd like to thank anyone reading who listened. I had a lot of fun making it, and am looking forward to recording our second series. There are plans afoot to make the next one in front of a studio audience (!) - or in other words there'll be drunkeness in a pub somewhere in London as the pair of us mess about with microphones (so, the usual then). Looks like we'll be going for a more monthly recording plan instead of the fortnightly format of Series One - hopefully the listeners will be able to hold their anticipation.

I was going to write a bit about Perplex City and it's recent postponement, but figured I want to think about it a little more. I promise (if only to myself) I'll get my thoughts down on paper - or at least the interwebs - I just want to form them fully first. And with that, I'll bid you goodnight, for I am tired. Saturdays can take it out of a person...

Well, if you wanted honesty...

2007-04-20T19:56:00.001-01:00

Good lord. Been ages since I posted anything. Not for the want of stuff to report and/or mouth off about, but sheer weight of work and time constraints led to a fair old bout of procrastination. Despite the fact that between my last post and now I have actually have two weeks off for the Easter Holidays, there hasn't been much in the way of free time in my world...

The Big Push has begun in earnest for my Final Teaching Practice, which begins properly on Monday. This is basically six weeks of me being Mr Fox 24 hours a day - I run the class, teaching how I want, setting the classroom as I like it, putting up whatever displays I choose... all that kind of stuff. It has taken an awful lot of preparation, but I finally think that I'm ready to go - instead of the minor fear that I'd normally expect to be feeling at this point, there's confidence. It's going to be a lot of work, but I am looking forward to it. Hopefully if there's a free second in the next 42 days, I'll get the chance to offload about it - but don't hold your breath.

As well as planning everything at school to within an inch of it's life, I did manage to do a couple of other things since I last posted. I finally managed to organise my Theory Test for my bike, and - shockingly - passed it first time! The questions were no worries, but the Hazard Perception Test was so poorly explained, I was actually a bit wary of it. For those who don't know, it's a touch-screen program where you have to spot developing problems on the road... Unfortunately, you don't know what hazards they're looking for, and if you press the screen too many times, you fail the question. Anyway, somehow I managed to get through it, and the next step is taking the actual driving test - booking it tomorrow, so hopefully I can burn the L plates soon. Who'd have thought that I'd be a biker?!

The new series of Doctor Who is living up to expectations and more. Martha the new companion is very good indeed, although I will always have a soft spot for Rose (and a huge crush on Billie Piper, of course). Sadly, having spoken to someone involved in the show I kind of know what happens in the series-encompassing story arc. Suffice to say, Mr Saxon is a very bad man... and it's going to be great. Plus - Daleks tomorrow! Woooooo!

There's also the small matter of me and the boy Elmo's podcast, which continues to roll on. We finally settled on a name too, kind of suggested by one of out hardcore band of listeners - "Joypod"! We're currently on Show 7, which you can download by right-clicking and Save Target-ing HERE if that's what you wish. So far we've been upstaged by a bee, managed to sell off Elmo as a gigolo, played some bloody good music, and (somehow) managed to talk a fair bit about games. Oh, I also managed to beat him at Wii Golf too, so yay for me. We still manage to squeeze out an episode every couple of weeks or so - you can subscribe on iTunes too, just tap "rllmuk" into the podcasts bit and you'll find us...

There's also been the odd bit of boardgaming (the new one from Days Of Wonder called Colosseum is aces, and I finally got round to having a session of Power Grid - I can see why it's well liked, but I found it a bit dry). I'm also planning on heading up to Birmingham in June for the UK Games Expo - need to save a bit of money to buy new stuff! - as a treat for completing my FTP. Just got to get through it first!

Ooh! Just remembered! Me and my boy Stan have been asked to reunite for another of our legendary DJ performances for a friend's wedding! Not til November, but I'm really quite excited already. We played together for years when I lived in Manchester and ran some pretty aces club nights - included the hallowed Loaded at Planet K and The Roadhouse - but now I live away, we don't see each other as much as I like, let alone dick about playing records. However, in a mere seven months (hah!) we shall rise again like a phoenix, get drunk and fall over while bellowing along to awful pop tunes. Fabulous, no?

Finally, the brain is... alright. Seems to be holding together, which is better than before. I get up in the morning with little or no problem now (again, an improvement on before!) but the meds I am on (a lot stronger than anything I've been prescribed before) seem to have two slightly meh effects: first, I now can only hit 5 or 6 hours sleep maximum a night, which necessitates a nap when I get in from work. Second, the appetite is shot; I can barely look at food most of the time, never mind inspire myself to go and rustle up a meal - which for someone who really enjoys cooking is a bit of a pain in the arse. I've spoken to my doctor about it, and they reckon though the food thing will subside eventually, the sleep (or lack of it) is pretty much here to stay. Bah say I - though I must secretly admit to rather enjoying the afternoon sleeps. It feels very decadent to me...

When love is gone, there's always justice

2007-03-26T20:26:00.000-01:00

A while since the last post, since (as usual) life took over, things went ever-so-slightly to pot, and I went a leetle beet mental. Well, not mental, but a few things happened that made me feel rather uncomfortable with myself. Aside from going to school, I barely left the house, and would do little more than sleep when at home (still finding it hard to drag my bleary self out of bed in the mornings, but I put that down to laziness). However, the medication has kicked in properly now, and I actually feel quite stable and - dare I say it - chilled out.

School is going well, as I'm gearing up for the forthcoming Final Teaching Practice. This is basically 6 weeks of mayhem, where I am *officially* the class' teacher, doing 90% of the lessons from day one, while Jenny (the proper teacher, as it were) does the odd observation of my work and drinks a lot of tea. I need to keep my grades above an Ofsted Level 3 ("satisfactory") though I obviously aim for 1s - "Outstanding". It's going to be very hard work, but (and maybe it's the drukqs talking) I'm feeling confident in my abilities. It's just the paperwork that's spectacularly annoying. Still, that's what Easter holidays are for - in a mere four days, it's a secksy Two Whole Weeks Off. Can't wait.
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I have recently been scaring the hell out of children at school by playing them "O Superman" by Laurie Anderson. If you've never heard it, you're missing out on the most avant-garde thing ever to nearly top the charts here in the UK (it got to #2 in 1981). Based on an aria from an 1885 opera by Jules Massenet called "Le Cid" - both are quite wonderful things. Anderson's version is essentially a spoken word cover - all vocoders, repetetive beats and curious imagery. Being a performance artist, the video is very odd, but strangely compelling. Song of the week, even though it's 26 years old.
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I had my first proper hangover of the year last Saturday! There's only two things that will heal my self-induced pain - getting a coffee (or 'vanilla flavoured milky gunk' as one friend refers to it as) and buying books. Thankfully my local Borders can fulfill both elements, so I headed there. As usual, I got frustrated because there was so much there I wanted, and couldn't decide what to blow my limited budget on - so I walked out bookless (though I did have the coffee, and it was tasty). Got home, perused my heaving shelves of stuff, pulled out a pile of books I've not read... and again, couldn't decide. So I plumped onto the sofa, fired up the TV to watch the Ireland game (beat Wales 1-0 in the Euro2008 Qualifiers - good stuff) and fell asleep.

When I woke up, I fumbled about for my glasses, put them on, and the first thing that my now working eyes fell upon was "The Time Traveller's Wife" by Audrey Niffenegger. I forgot how much I loved this book when I first read it, so it's currently being read again - and it's still a beautiful thing. There's just something so unashamedly... lovely about it. The fact that the link between the characters is so strong, so incredibly powerful - it just brings out the insufferable romantic in me. Clare's tolerance of Henry's chrono-impaired state (if you've not read it, that sentence will make no sense, so just go get the book) is a continual act of love, even if it means not seeing him for long periods at a time. As with all the great romantic stories, it takes a tragic turn, but ultimately ends with a final shot of happiness. It's incredibly well written, even if it seems initially confusing - I'd even suggest reading with a pen and pad to put a timeline together the first time you read it, just to keep yourself on track. It nearly restores my faith in people. Nearly.

It's OK, it's alright, nothing's wrong.

2007-03-02T20:15:00.000-01:00

Many things to report. Some good, some not so good, but hey. This is going to be a bit stream of conciousness, I think, so brace yourself for tangents aplenty; that's kind of where my brain is at the moment. First off, in exciting swizzy news, the increasingly popular (for no reason at all I can think of bar an increase of drugs in the world's water supplies) Michael and Elmo Podcast has somehow stumbled into it's third episode, which you can listen to here if that is what you so desire. For the more masochistic amongst you perhaps the idea of subscribing appeals, in which case you may care to do the following:

- Open up your iTunes
- Go to Advanced
- Click "Subscribe to Podcast"
- Copy and Paste this into the space --> http://feeds.feedburner.com/blogspot/OXkB

...and that's it! We're having a lot of fun making it, even if the sound quality can be a bit bobbins. Bear with us - we've decided that if we ever get any money ever, we're going to buy some proper mics, not the SingStar ones we use at the moment. Personally, I'm drooling over a pair of SM58s, but that's just my suppressed inner sound geek crying out for attention.

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There's a band called The Horrors. I heard about them a few months ago in an Observer piece about underage clubs and (of course) the use of MySpace to promote music. Never actually heard any of their tunes until this week. Now I wish to stab the very drums out of my ears. They're shit... People should go listen to CSS or something. Or Devo. Devo are good. Me and Elmo are off to see Eagles Of Death Metal next weekend. Not only will that be good, that's going to be dirty in the extreme. Which is a Good Thing.

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I'm back on the Drugs again - good ones, obviously, not nasty ones you get off a guy called "Biggsey" in a pub toilet. I've been having a few massive episodes over the last couple of weeks, and decided a few days ago that the middle of the most important year of my life (education wise) isn't the wisest place to have a full breakdown. Went back to The Nice Doctor (the Nasty one being the guy who took me off them last year!) who listened to everything I had to say and promptly put me on the strongest SSRIs I've ever been on (Escitalopram 20mg). While it may not be a huge amount, I'm hoping that it'll shock my system enough into helping me get through the next few months. I certainly need something, as I felt myself slipping a fair few times in the last month.

A horrible one was actually last weekend, where I was DJing for the first time in a few months (alongside my apprentice, the charming Coxtin) at the Perplex City End-of-Season-One Bash. What should have been a lovely evening (and for the vast majority, it was - drinks, dancing, puzzles, and silliness) turned into a really horrible experience for me, thanks to one small part of my brain deciding to take over the rest for no reason whatsoever. Sigh. Mercifully, there are several people who managed to talk me down off the ceiling, and I will be thankful to them for a long time for settling me, convincing me that I'd be OK, and telling me that walking halfway across London in order to go wait for a train that wouldn't be there for 5 hours was probably a stupid idea. I shan't say who they are, but they do read this, and they (hopefully) know how much I am grateful for them.

So yeah, back on the tablets. Not an admission of failure, more a desire to help me cope with stuff until I feel ready to sort myself out. At the moment I feel far from ready, but one day (soon, I hope) it'll happen. It's a necessary evil (because yes, I do get side effects - sleep and appetite are affected mainly) in order to stop the dischordant noise that I have in my head most of the time. Without the medication, it does clear once in a while, and I get to function normally for brief shining moments. With the meds... well - I'm hoping for longer periods of being able to deal with stuff. Reports as and when :D

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Back to all things Perplex City-ish. The world's favourite ARG (kind of) kicked off it's second series yesterday with the release of the first wave of Season Two cards. If you're lucky enough to have got your hands on some, you may see my name on a few of them - they turned out just as I envisioned them all those months ago, so I'm pleased with them. I think my favourite of them all is "1,2,3,4" - basically an equation involving Beatles songs. A simple idea I had late one night that took AGES to actually put together. If you're a player, I hope you enjoy my contributions. And if you're not... why not? Go here and start investigating...

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Guillemots are making me smile a bit. People should buy their CDs. Also, I think I'm now the oldest emo-boy on earth, as my iPod is currently listing Fall Out Boy in six of it's Top 25 Most Listened To Songs. All American Rejects are also making a show of it with three, Panic At The Disco! with two, and +44 (risen from the ashes of Blink 182) have two as well... I'm probably far too old for this stuff, but meh. It's getting me through some bad days. Nothing helps clear the mind better than shouting along to tales of suburban-American teen-angst - even if I'm twelve years late.

Podcasts and Puzzles

2007-02-14T20:35:00.000-01:00

Me and my mate Elmo (both fine denizens of rllmukforum.com - link's over there on the right - have finally got ourselves together and done a podcast! It's about games and stuff, and really should carry some sort of language warning. Lots of people seem to like it - perhaps you will too. Download the new episode at http://perplexorum.com/tpwnn/Episode2.mp3. And cheers to the mighty skenmy for doing the hosting thing - next one should be up and about in a couple of weeks .

As for the puzzle in my last post, a couple of people managed to solve it (after a couple of hints!). One fine poster on Perplexorum even did a shiny multi-coloured picture to show his workings (cheers Rob) which you can see below...

That's the first step. I'll post the answer in whited-out text so you can keep trying if you wish... ready?
-> If you read the words on the board, you should see the instruction to "find question, need discover missing tiles". The missing ones are scribbled up there in the top corner of the image. Anagram them up and you'll (hopefully) get MY CREATOR. And who was the creator of Scrabble? Why... Alfred Mosher Butts, of course! <-

Well done Typhin on solving it first. A pint is yours!

The Slaying of the Boredom Monsters

2007-02-13T11:53:00.000-01:00

Half term, day two - and I'm bored already. That's probably a good sign, means I want to get back to school and do more teaching. Anyhow, to kill some time, I've been designing some new puzzles. I'll fire them up here over the next few days... if I remember, of course.

Here's your first one! First correct solve wins a pint! You can give me your answer (do) in the comments, by email (idlemichael@gmail.com), or harrassment in #perplexorum on IRC.

Good luck - I think it's a stinker!

It All Ovah!

2007-02-11T20:56:00.000-01:00

Two big things in my life have ended over the last week or so, which make me feel a bit odd. It's a nice odd feeling though, because it means that even though they are now a thing of the past, they've been two major contributing factors to Who I Am. Let me babble on about them for a bit, then I'll shut up.

First off, the school thing. I've spent the last six weeks working in my Cross-phase School - basically experiencing life in a different Key Stage (in my case, I'm usually in KS2, though since January I've been in Foundation and KS1). Initially I found it *incredibly* difficult, completely out of my comfort zone; after all, controlling a group of 26 six- and seven-year-olds is a whole different barrel of monkeys to a similar sized group of children even a couple of years older. They're much more dependent on you. Every single point that you try to teach them has to be spelled out in baby-steps - as a teacher, you cannot assume that they know even the most basic things. Hell, the Lower Ability group I was working with struggled with reading even basic sentences and doing simple addition. And because of that, for the first couple of weeks, I felt really out of my depth.

This was not an easy few weeks. Hitting the ground running was tricky, trying not to step on any of the established staff's toes, learning all the children's names... and then trying to plan lessons (and teach them while under constant scrutiny!) on top of that. However, about halfway through the second week, it all just seemed to click - somehow, I became organised... my lessons seemed to be getting through to the kids... my observation scores rose from mediocre 4s to actually pretty good 2s (even a couple of godlike 1s crept in there towards the end!). And for the first time since I started this course, I finally feel like a proper teacher. Last Friday was my final day with them, and (for once) I even got a bit emotional; the whole class made me a fantastic card - with a picture of each one of them inside. I'm going to miss those little buggers... though I have promised I'll go back and visit :D

The other big thing that has concluded is (if you've been following) the first season of Perplex City. Those who have no idea who Scarlett, Violet, Sente and company are, I'd suggest skipping to the next bit... Anyway, the missing Receda Cube was retrieved from a forest just outside Corby, here in the UK (which I happened to have been in the day before after recieving a 7am alarm call last Saturday!). One very lucky player will be presented with a rather splendid £100,000 at a party in That London on the 24th, at which - of course - I shall be in attendance. Of course, now that the whole thing is over (for a couple of weeks, anyway, until Season Two kicks in), it seemed like a perfect time to think back on the whole thing and how much impact it's had on my life over the last two years...

It's not the cards. It's not the fact that I *nearly* got a completely insane job at the company behind the whole shebang (in fact, I think if I did get that job, I wouldn't be the same person I am now). It's not the story, even... the best thing I've got out of the whole Perplex City thing is the people I've met through it. The live events are obviously a lot of fun, but there's also the online stuff too. The fact that a whole bunch of us talk for hours on the interwebs all night makes me happy - even if there's bugger all happening in the story - and I'm proud and happy to call these people my friends. Some I may never even meet in Real Life, and obviously there are a few people to whom I am closer than others, but we're still a team, and I would like to say thank you to them all. Cheers guys. Roll on Season Two!

Jaffa cakes and Persocons - 2007 Refix

2007-01-05T13:42:00.000-01:00

Merry new year to you! 2007 has rolled around, and nothing seems to have changed. I still don't live on the moon, don't own a flying car, or wear silver clothes. The winner of X-Factor is still at number one, where it should be Klaxons. I should be eating soylent green for tea, but I'm actually having chicken pie. Life, in other words, is exactly the same as it ever was...

Christmas was as expected - rubbish. A couple of decent presents (Ticket To Ride boardgame, ticket to see Eagles of Death Metal, a copy of Art Spiegelman's "Maus"), but no other details; simply nothing happened. New Years Eve, that perennial disappointment, was possibly my worst yet, culminating in the daddy of all Panic Attacks at about half-ten. I went home, crawled into bed, and fell asleep by 11.15pm. Midnight was celebrated by the sound of me snoring.

Come to think of it, that's not too bad a NYE by my usual standards. At least it was cheap.

Anyhow, a few days have passed, the year is finding it's feet, and I have done bugger all. Don't go back to school until Monday, so I have spent most of the past few days cleaning house, watching Chobits and Ugly Betty through the Wii's online brilliance (seriously, www.alluc.org is one of the greatest websites ever), eating Jaffa Cakes and drinking tea. Splendid stuff. There has also been the usual rash of resolutions made, none of which I have done that much about. I will start getting some exercise this year though - I'm quite sure my DNA is mixing with the sofa's to almost dangerous levels.

One plan is coming to fruition though. No huge amount of detail yet - when it happens, then I'll let you know - but me and elmo are sorting something out to unleash on the world sometime soon. Guaranteed, it will be silly. Stay tuned.

Oh, one last thing: Re-versions of Tintin cartoons are officially the best thing on the Interwebs RIGHT NOW. Go see. Warning: Reet Boro Language used.

Music 2006

2006-12-22T11:48:00.000-01:00

There was me thinking I could get away with not doing another blog post until after the holidays, but nooooooooo. The usual random discussion with The American turned to best songs of the year, then - as I am quite the superficial bugger - the finest videos. So may I present to you, thanks to the glory of Youtube and Google Video, my favourite tunes and videos of 2006 in no particular order. I promise to keep it... reasonably limited. Hold on!

The Gossip - Standing in the way of control Damn. Just... damn. Possibly the song with the most soul of the year.

Justice vs Simian - We Are Your Friends Yes, I know the song's a couple of years old, but it was put out this year, and the video led to Kanye West making an arse of himself at the MTV Europe Awards. Cracking song, which saw much shouting while drunk.

Jamie T - If You Got The Money Still relatively unknown despite having a few singles out. It's a toss up between this and another of his fine offerings "Shiela". Both are good.

CSS - Let's Make Love (Listen to Death From Above) From one of my favourite albums of the year (which you must go buy NOW, if only for "Patins"), I mentioned this song a few months back. Fully aces. Still not sick of it.

Camera Obscura - Hey Lloyd (I'm Ready To Be Heartbroken) Winsome Scottish Indie Pop FTW! Just plain lovely stuff.

Guillemots - Trains to Brazil I think, after much consideration, that this is my favourite song of the whole year. It's just so full of hope, and the video is really quite lovely. Also, please can I have the (double) bass player for Christmas, please? Ta.

Elbow - Station Approach I have to have at least one bunch of mates in my list, and as their latest album came with a DVD with videos for each song, there's quite a choice. This is the opener to the Leaders Of The Free World album, and sums up everything I love about Manchester. For another great Elbow video, check out the one for the title track.

Thom Yorke - Harrowdown Hill One of the more emotive songs of the year. Bloody good.

Fedde le Grand - Put Your Hands Up For Detroit Seriously, one of the finest songs of the year. Dunb as hell video, but the tune is catchy like a spider's web.

Muse - Knights of Cydonia Huge, silly, overblown - typical Muse, it seems! The video doesn't really fit the song, but no matter: Cydonia is such a massive song, it still shines through.

Actually, that's not bad - ten songs, all crackers in their own right. Agree with my choices? Don't agree at all? Let me know :D

Oh, and (again) Happy Holidays!

One down, Two to go...

2006-12-21T21:41:00.000-01:00

And there it is - one whole term as a teacher completed. I am shocked as to where it's all gone, pleased to note that I have survived it, and amazed to see that I feel I have... I dunno... changed, I think. I feel a lot more confident in my abilities, which is a quite obvious thing to state. When the term started I'd had very little experience of teaching, while now I can happily stand in front of a class and freestyle for an hour on several random subjects. I am happier in myself, even though I am still prone to the usual days when the big black dog comes to call.

Best of all, I can handle groups of people (especially strangers) much better than I used to be able to, which is probably the thing I am most pleased about. The past couple of years have seen me - for no reason I can fathom myself - become even more intoverted than I was before. My self belief shrank to virtually nothing, but now... I feel like it's coming back - even if it's only in tiny steps. But tiny steps are a good start.

There are still a few things to deal with. I still can't take praise from most people. My head teacher insists that I am an asset to the school, but I still think I'm just a doofus who shows up every morning, messes about, and somehow still manages to get called a teacher. The kids (not just in my class) were up in arms that I wouldn't be back until after next half-term as I am apparently "The Best Teacher In School" (according to my new mug one of them got me for Christmukkah). Most people would say "Yay for me", but I just want to run to the nearest corner... like I say, something to deal with - and there's still two terms to get that sorted.

As for now though, it's time to let my brain relax and do nothing for a couple of weeks. A few games, a bunch of movies, plenty of food, and the odd curmudgeonly roar of "Bah, Humbug". Compliments of the season, lovely readers. See you after Turkey Day.

Wah Wah Wii Wah

2006-12-20T20:06:00.000-01:00

Well, it's taken a while, but finally - a few impressions on the newest and shinyest toy I own, my lovely Nintendo Wii! It's a small little thing, the size of a decent hardback, but is of a surprising weight. Currently sitting next to my archaic TV (with it's little motion sensor bar under the screen), I picked it up on launch day, and have had a few good sessions playing stuff, but haven't really had time to sit down and actually think about it until now...

First up - Miis. Whoever thought of the idea of being able to make a little caricature version of you, your friends and a bunch of serial killers (or whoever you like) to live inside your machine deserves a warm handshake and a healthy payrise. Getting the little buggers to travel to other people's Wii is a masterstroke, as I'm sure I know folks who have spent more time creating Miis than actually playing games... On top of that, there's the fact that Miis appear in certain games (currently only Wii Sports and Wii Play, but they'll also be in Wario Ware and a Sims-alike game that EA are producing). A great idea. Well done to whoever thought of it.

Second - the Wiimote. Simply a great idea. Works incredibly well, feels solid to hold, and is accessible to pretty much the whole populace. However, a great big meh to all these idiots blaming the wrist-straps for breaking and smashing TVs, lights and faces - don't blame Nintendo, blame your own ineptitude and oafish ways, OK?

Third - the games. Only got Wii Play, Rayman Raving Rabbids, Zelda and Wii Sports (bundled, of course) at the moment. Wii Sports is a great introduction to the system, and really helps you get used to the new control methods. I'm particularly fond of Bowling (current high score: 187 - about 140 higher than bowling in real life), Golf (as crap at that as I am in real life) and Baseball (which I have never played in real life, ever). The Boxing's alright - if a little unresponsive sometimes - and Tennis is just an arm-swinging mentalfest... or it is if you play it with your Year 4 Games Club ;)

Wii Play is another minigame collection, bundled with a Wiimote. The games are pretty basic, but as you're only paying a few quid extra, I think it's worth it - there's a Duck Hunt-esque shooter in there, a fairly whizzy Billiards game, and a great update of the old Combat game on the 2600 (which is what I'm spending most of my time on, scarily). Not out in the States yet, but then we don't have Elebits or Trauma Centre, and I know what I'd prefer.

Raving Rabbids is another minigame compilation, and is... alright. There's a rather splendid "wander round and shoot deranged bunnies in the face" component, but I think this one may well be traded in pretty sharpish. Mainly because I like the look of Madden 07 and fancy giving it a go!

Finally, Zelda: Twilight Princess. I have played this for the grand total of... 35 minutes. Shocking, I know, but thanks to work being insanely busy, I haven't been able to dedicate a decent amount of time to the Wii's first Triple-A title. However, as of tomorrow I will be off school for just over two solid weeks, and plan to dedicate a fair few hours to the latest in the long line of Link's fine adventures. Bring it on, I say!

Last, the online stuff. The Weather Channel is up and running, and while it's pretty, it's not really that much use. The News Channel is still 6 weeks away, but the Internet Browser should be available as of Friday this week. I'm interested to see how it works, what stuff it supports and such like. Update as and when, as usual. As for the Virtual Console (downloading old NES, SNES, N64, PC Engine, and Megadrive titles), I think it's aces, though I hope Nintendo realise that people want to play games that were never seen in certain regions. For us Europeans, I'm talking about stuff like Super Mario RPG on the SNES, and the N64's Sin & Punishment and Bangaioh (which came out on the Dreamcast, I know, but the 64 version is top!). If that happens, I'll be happy. I'll also be amazed, knowing what Nintendo of Europe are like.

All in all, it's a cracking little machine. The launch line-up was... OK, but I'm looking forward to upcoming stuff like Wario Ware Smooth Moves (being a sucker for the WW games!), Elebits (which The American owns already, and loves) and Trauma Centre (so I can cut people up legally and without danger of being covered in blood or cheeky prison love). However, as these aren't out until January, Zelda will be taking all of my time. Not that I'm complaining, of course...

Press Start

2006-12-07T21:40:00.000-01:00

Boing boing boing. I am getting excited.

It's 24 hours until the Nintendo Wii comes out, and I WANT IT NOW! Me and The Elmo are heading into town tomorrow night to pick up our machines and a pile of games at the midnight launch that Gamestation is doing, and I can't wait. There will be a few beers, a game or two of pool at the new place that's just opened in town (a place I want to go out to in Milton Keynes? Surely not!) then roll down to get the new toys. I am such a geek for Nintendo machines - I always have been and always will be, unapologetically. 360s and all manner of Sony systems may come and go, but there will always be a little place in my heart for everything that Kyoto's finest can offer. Bring it on!

School news: This week, I've been visiting the school I'll be working at for the first six weeks of the Spring 2007 (eeeek!) term. This is the cross-phase part of my training, where I experience the opposite Key Stage of the one I'm currently with. In my case, I teach Year 5, who are KS2, so the new bunch are little 'uns - KS1, which covers Foundation and Years 1 and 2. Basically, four to seven year olds. I spent today in Foundation, where one of the youngest (Angela, who is 4, and reminds me a lot of Lola) took me under her wing and re-introduced me to life as a small person. We played all day, making giant towers out of Duplo, pretending to work in the Post Office, putting on a production of Whoops-a-Daisy Angels using finger puppets, reading stories, and speaking Spanish - I don't speak Spanish at all, but Angela does, and she took great delight in her teaching me.

When the day had ended, I was exhausted. You forget how much energy you expend just playing about. The class teacher sat me down, gave me a cup of tea, and we talked about the day. She asked what I thought I had taught today, and when I replied "nothing" (as to me, all I'd done was play with a class full of small people) she told me to take a minute and think. Ten minutes later, we'd compiled an A4 list of stuff that we'd done, and what the children had learnt. Concepts like tallness (the Duplo tower of Doom, which ended up taller than me!), fine motor skills (using a hammer and pins on a tap-board), phonics (playing with magnetic letters), ICT skills (drawing snowmen in MS Paint)... the list was huge. Made me think that perhaps lower years is what I want to do - but we'll see if I still think the same in mid-February, shall we?

Of course, last week saw me perform the ultimate test for any male teacher in a primary school... I had to dress up as Santa Claus for the Christmas Fair. Me, the one who dislikes anything festive with a passion, was (for two hours) the embodiment of the whole damn thing. And shockingly enough, it looks like I pulled it off quite well. I only made one child cry, but she was only six months old so I don't think it was entirely my fault... I saw over 50 children over the course of the whole thing, gave out a ton of presents, and have had lots of good reports from parents and teachers over the past few days, so all in all it was worth doing. The children seemed to enjoy themselves, and that's what I'm here for. Oh, and here's what I looked like, along with my fellow student Kate the Christmas Fairy:

Anyway, enough of that. I may have done more work in the last few weeks than I have in the whole rest of my life. All I care about at the minute is getting my hands on that Wiimote and Zelda tomorrow night - and as soon as I can tear myself away from it, I shall post my first impressions and stuff. Bring it on!

Head asplode!

2006-11-19T21:00:00.000-01:00

Good lord. Been well over a month since I last checked in! Seriously, I must do better when it comes down to noting my random thoughts and warblings. As usual, school is to blame - sooooo busy. Pull up a chair and let me tell you everything that's been going on...

So. School. Yes. Ridiculous amounts of work has piled up, and all has been going pretty well. Last Friday was the last day of my first "Graded Teaching Practice" - basically, many of the lessons I teach have someone sitting in on them, watching how I work, what I teach, my manner with the children and all that jazz. Generally they've been OK - different things in the lessons are marked on a scale from one to six, with one being Godlike and six A Miserable Failure. GTP students (ie: me and my classmates) are encouraged to aim - at the highest! - for a Satisfactory three overall. Thankfully, I hit threes in all catagories overall, and even a couple of twos (for my use of resources and how I am with the kids). I was most pleased, especially when I found out that many of the people on my course hadn't reached such dizzy heights...

Must... not... be... smug.

;)

In other parts of my life... well, there's a serious lack of stuff to report. I get up, I go to work, I teach (a lot - we've had many staff off with bugs and stuff), I go to meetings, I come home, I plan, I eat, I sleep. And then it all happens again! Aside from on weekends, when the going to work doesn't happen, but the planning increases hugely. However, this weekend has been a little different - I'm away next week for three days on a residential course in That London, and am not teaching tomorrow, so there's been nothing to do! And of course, when michael needs to relax... he tidies.

Hardcore tidying. This house is spotless. There isn't an inch of surface that hasn't been dusted, a plate cleaned, floor hoovered, or clothing that's not been in the washer... The only thing that remains is a pile of filing currently sitting on the dining table - maybe tomorrow, eh? Can't do everything in one weekend.

I'm hoping the few days away will actually be a chance to relax. I don't feel like I've stopped for nearly three months, and I'm really tired. Immune systems are buggered, so I'm always at least a snot-producing monster. At the moment, I have a sinus infection, meaning nasty headaches (until the antibiotics kick in), icky runny nose, and don't get half as much sleep as I should be getting. The London Visit should hopefully be an opportunity to wind down and do little more than sit at the back of the conference centre's room, drinking tea and pretending to pay attention. And I've been ordered to bring my many variations of SingStar by my classmates, who will be providing The Booze... this cannot end well!

Updates and reports - I promise - after a gap of a lot less than a month!

Like Buses

2006-10-16T14:26:00.000-01:00

Good lord, it's been a while. Every day I say to myself "ooooh, I must write something on my blog", then stupid stuff like work and life gets in the way. However, I have a bit of time to myself now, so here I am with an all-encompassing round up of all things in the world of michael.

First up, I have turned another year older (as of October 5th). I am now the unremarkable age of 31, a year in which nothing of note happens. The actual day fell on a Thursday - again, unremarkable - and all I did was go to college, came home to a power cut, slept a few hours, watched bad TV, got a takeaway and went back to bed. Such a thrill! Gifts wise, I got a few books, Borders vouchers, tickets to the Rocky Horror Show and a contribution or two to my forthcoming Wii. A good haul, all told!

I celebrated properly a couple of days later with many and various good people at the Perplex City CubeFest '06 - basically an excuse for getting drunkyarded and making a fool of myself without causing massive damage to anyone else. There were pints of Guinness aplenty, ridiculous acting onstage - instigated by His Floppyness, Guy - singing and dancing, LOTS of glitter, singing and dancing, boy on boy action (ahem) and even a kebab. The whole day was a winner, and pictures can be seen here. I even managed to get the lovely people at Mind Candy to donate a copy of their new game to my school's Games Club, and it's gone down a storm. The following day, getting back from London was a nightmare however, taking SIX hours to travel to Milton Keynes - mainly down to the idiocy of the rail network's staff, who wouldn't know the correct answer to a question if it cam up and kicked them in the arse. Still, at least I had plenty to read, so, I was entertained. Also, I'm working on a Top Sekrit Project, which kills a lot of time... hopefully it'll sort of work, and I'll do a big reveal sometime soon.

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Oh, I found this a few days ago. Combines my love of the wonderful Ben Folds with one of the best songs ever written, "Such Great Heights". Originally a Postal Service tune, then beautifully covered by Iron and Wine, I think even Girls Aloud could do a version of this song and it'd still sound aces. Also listening to lots of new Deftones and Muse stuff at the moment. Loud and crashy guitars are my current key to happiness, it would seem, as opposed to the usual introspective whiny emo stuff that I normally favour... not that there's anything wrong with whiny emo stuff. Not at all. No. Uh uh.

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What else is going on then...? School continues to be hard work but still fun. The paperwork and assignments are piling up in style now, but I'm just about managing to keep on top of it all. Next week is half term, which means one whole week of taking time out, catching up on what needs to be done, and getting prepared for my first official Teaching Practice - three weeks of fully observed michael in action. I'm getting more and more confident in my abilities now, learning new skills and ways to corral 20-plus children into doing exactly what you want them to do. Also, I love the fact that I can experiment in class with how I want to run things. Last week I had a Design Technology class where the children are making cam-toys. Normally they're left to their own devices and told - basically - to be quiet and work. I set my guidelines out, saying they could talk (up to a certain volume) and we'd also have a bit of music - nice calm stuff, a bit of Jeff Buckley, some Sigur Ros - and they loved it. Sure, the occasional dissenter wanted something "less rubbish" (which was met with a stern "who's the teacher here?" look), but the vast majority enjoyed the lesson and are looking forward to the next one. Obviously you couldn't do something like play music in a more academic strand - maths needs to be a lot more interactive and you *must* concentrate, for example, but with creative lessons you can make it a bit more fun.

Oh, I took my Skills Tests today - they're three mini-exams that all trainee teachers have to take and pass before they can become qualified. Many people (including me) panic over them as they've not sat an exam since they were at school themselves, but I just thought I'd give them a shot... and what do you know: I passed all three of them in one go, first time! Numeracy, Literacy and ICT, all shot down one after the other in the space of one hour and fourteen minutes - bear in mind that you're given three hours in total to complete them and you'll see how geeky / proud I feel... In fact, I may celebrate with a beer or two. Or seven. Or even more at the weekend, as I'm off to Manchester in the sunny (hah!) North to visit The Brother...

Cheese before bedtime?

2006-09-28T12:59:00.000-01:00

OK, so it's just before 3pm on a weekday - when I should be in school, of course - but I am actually in bed. Yes, I have finally succumbed to the many and various virii that have taken residence inside me, and I am (properly! not man-flu!) ill. I woke up this morning at the usual time, feebly threw an arm out to switch off the radio, rang school to say I was feeling horrid and passed out back into sleep again.

Last night I had some very weird dreams, in between all of the waking up / coughing and spluttering stuff. The most notable started with me just being out and bumping into Kate Moss, us becoming great mates, and her buying me a shiny new guitar. Then Heat magazine (a UK gossip mag, fact fans) printed a story about us getting married, which got us angry and led to both Kate Moss and I going to their offices to wreck the joint. Then I woke up. And if anyone can tell me where the hell that come from and what on earth it could mean, I would appreciate it greatly. I promise I didn't eat anything dodgy before bed last night at all, but that dream (and it's vividness) has completely thrown me for six. And Kate Moss isn't even that hawt.

Moving on, school is going well, even though I had a terrible day on Tuesday. One of those days when nothing seemed to be going right - my lessons I taught that day were alright (nothing special), my bike broke down AGAIN, I was feeling the start of this wave of illness... just lots of little things all building up that saw me just take to bed as soon as I got home. However, I have chosen to do this course, so I've got to take the good with the bad, and yesterday saw an improvement. I only did one lesson (Maths) but it was good, mainly down to me going mental with the Interactive Whiteboard, making all manner of screens with movable pizzas, chocolate bars and the like. Who'd have thought that fractions could actually be vaguely interesting? And more importantly, that I would be the person to do it?

The name is Fox... Mr Fox...

2006-09-19T20:31:00.000-01:00

Ladies and Gentlemen - I am now *officially* a teacher. Well, not proper officially, but I did teach my first lesson today. Though it was very much an in-at-the-deep-end thing, I thought I shoudl do something I knew about, so first lesson this morning was The Beginning: ICT (Information and Communication Technology). Me and computers are an OK partnership, so off we trotted to the school's ICT Lab - 23 nine- and ten-year-olds and the man of the (amateur) hour!

A quick recap of last week's lesson went OK, and a quick Q&A session was pretty good too. Each member of the class was then despatched to their own PC, promptly logged in, and looked to me for the guidance and instruction that the teacher is meant to provide... and you know what? I think I did a pretty good job. We're doing "retrieving information from databases" at the minute, and I was charged with explaining a few of the more complex instructions the system uses. It took a fair bit of explaining (and showing examples on the classroom's projector screen, of course) but even the less adept members of the group got the hang of it after a while. They even worked their way through a sheet of questions I'd prepared, only pointing out two of the three spelling mistakes! I'm only human.

Anyway, the hour long lesson absolutely flew by. While the class were off in assembly, I discussed how I'd done with the proper class teacher. As usual, she was very positive, along with being happy she didn't have to do the lesson herself as she's quite the technophobe. She then asked if I'd be willing to do every ICT class through the year, to which I agreed - after all, I want as much experience as possible. We then planned a schedule of other lessons I can take a crack at... so tomorrow I'm trying Maths AND Science.

There's deep end and there's Atlantic Ocean levels. I don't think I'll be too bad, but there's always the thought that I've bitten off more than I can chew. Ah well - we shall see what happens.

Also - quick note - "World War Z" which I bought yesterday is amazing.

Brain static

2006-09-18T19:41:00.000-01:00

No real structure to this update today. Merely random stuff spilling from my head. I apologise in advance for the deviation from the regular programming, but it seems I can't keep my mind on one subject for more that 2 minutes.

Icky news: I *still* feel like poo, though the weary bone phase seems to have passed. I'm now on what I pray is the final section of the virus, wherein I produce the equivalent of a small ocean of mucus on an hourly basis. To add more fuel to the bodyshock, I now firmly believe someone at school has fleas, as I now have - no exaggeration - 20 different insect bites; 18 on my legs, and 2 on my left wrist, which is bloody KILLING ME! The only solutions are to either fumigate the school or shave all the kids. I shall decide overnight on which option to select.

If you're a regular(ish) reader of my little corner of the interwebs, you'll know that when I feel crappy, only shopping for music or books will drag me out of my malaise. Today, in between all the sneezing, I hit the bookstore and picked up Max Brooks (son, I discovered today of Mel!) latest offering - "World War Z". Told completely straight, it chronicles a near-future war between humans and the undead, and so is perfect bedtime reading. I also picked up some (gasp!) manga for the first time since Akira first came out - probably - in the shape of the first volume of "Battle Royale". As I like the book and love the film(s), I'm pretty sure I'm on safe ground. Oh, and to add another one to the pile, when I got home from work, a copy of John Allison's latest Scary Go Round collection was sitting on the mat. It's called "The Retribution Index", and collates a good year's worth of adventures of Shelley, Amy and Co. Well worth getting, alongside pretty much everything else he's done.

That's about it, to be honest. I need a good night's sleep as I'm teaching my first 'proper' lesson to the class tomorrow, and I want to be on good form. News on that tomorrow!

sniff

2006-09-12T20:31:00.000-01:00

Wuuuuuurrrrrghhh. Five days in, and already the children of school have infected the adult population with their evil lurgey. Actually, scratch that - they've actually only infected the people who haven't been exposed to their bugs and germs before; namely me and my fellow trainee Kate. We're already wiped out and it's only Tuesday. I'm sure by the time the weekend rolls round we'll be like extras from any given Romero zombie flick. Until then, we fight on, pitchforks and flaming torches in hand.

School is still good. I'm still waking up in the morning with a smile. Even if you were to go into the place with a bad mood on, I'm quite sure that after ten minutes of the constant attention that you get on entering a classroom the mood would lift, simply because it has to. No bad thing, that. The teacher I work with is incredibly supportive, takes on my ideas and suggestions, and seems happy with what I do in class. I've even taken a few plenaries - summations to you and me - already, and will be doing my first whole lesson next week! Nothing like being thrown in at the deep end. And if you mess something up, as long as you're honest the children are fine. It's if you try and cover a mistake that they'll absolutely destroy you ;)

I think I'm doing alright on my paperwork and stuff so far too. I'm going to have a pile of folders reaching the ceiling by the end of the year, but at the moment all seems to be under control. I find coming home, getting a brew, then sitting in front of the computer and getting on with stuff for another hour or so is the best way of dealing with it - which for me is quite surprising. I've never really been motivated to do that 'continuing work when you get home' thing before... instead I've preferred the idea of 'forget about work as soon as you walk out the door'. Does this mean I may well actually be growing up? Has the lazy michael suddenly discovered (gasp!)... a work ethic?

Stay tuned to find out.

Remembering

2006-09-06T20:17:00.000-01:00

I know I'm in a happy mood and all that, but I've been meaning to post this for a while, and kept forgetting. Well, now I've remembered, and though this is officially a Sad Post, I hope you see the love that's in it too. About six months ago, a good friend of mine died. I shan't go into the specifics of what happened, but when I heard it knocked me sideways. Anyway, when the whole thing was done, I posted a thread on one of the forums I write on, just to collect my thoughts really and try and make sense of what had gone on. I constantly worry that it'll get deleted off the forum, so I just want to put it here for posterity, I suppose. It's one of the most honest things I've ever written.

"So I'm 30, and never had to go to a funeral until yesterday. A good friend of mine died on Saturday, though (thanks to not checking my emails) I didn't find out until Sunday night. Cue mayhem as I tried to organise time off from work, making sure my suit was clean, and getting everything generally sorted. Wasn't even sure I'd make the funeral as the police had to release the body as it was 'suspicious circumstances', so coming up to Manchester on Monday saw me fretting on the train as to whether I'd miss my chance to say goodbye.

Thankfully(!) it all took place on Tuesday. Plenty of time for people to drop everything and make their way back. As Monday afternoon turned to evening, friends I hadn't seen for ages all arrived in ones and twos at our meeting places (Night and Day and The Temple of Convenience). Drink flowed. Music played. Songs were sung. Stories told. Tears were cried. I've never been a witness to so much love - not just for our departed Brian, but for all the people left behind.

More people arrived - tour dates cancelled with hours notice (Brian was a musician, and a bloody good one at that) as they flew in from Europe, from the USA. More songs, more stories. Eventually bed beckoned, and I realised I had nowhere to stay - I'd forgotten to organise something in the mayhem. Sofas and spare beds were offered immediately as everyone just pulled together.

Tuesday morning, all back to Night and Day. People looking incredible, the girls beautiful, the boys smart - everyone smiling, telling more tales, but knowing that soon it would be the last chance to say goodbye. A fleet of cabs to the Jewish Cemetary in Failsworth, and seeing the hundreds of people gathered showed us all how much he was loved. The ceremony was moving (obviously), but still had an element of joy about it - even a few jokes. The sun shone on a cold January morning as we laid Brian to rest next to his dad. Not many tears, just a few shakes of the head and the odd "I can't believe it".

Back again to N&D for the wake, or The Aftershow as we referred to it. Speeches, champagne and salutes. The gathering of phone numbers, promises of seeing each other soon (and even better, the knowledge that these promises would ring true). A few goodbyes, kisses and hugs from friends, and a few private tears on the train home.

Not bad for a first funeral. Good luck Brian, you silly bastard. We'll miss you."

I still think of Brian, and all my friends I left in Manchester. And if anything good came from him leaving us, it was that the promises we made to see each other more did come true. We still miss him, and we still know he was a silly bastard, but cheers mate - wherever you are.

It begins.

2006-09-06T18:57:00.000-01:00

Wednesday 6th September, 2006. The day I lose my first name, and am destined to be referred to by small people as "Mr Fox" for the rest of my life. Ladies and Gentlemen of the interwebs - today was my first proper day as a trainee teacher. And it was fun. You know that you're finally in a good place when you walk into assembly to be introduced to the entire school to the sound of The Flaming Lips - turns out the Headmistress (who is mid-50s, by the way) is a big fan of Wayne and co. Amazing scenes :)

I've actually spent the last few days in school, preparing everything for the arrival of the children today. Monday and Tuesday involved the final sorting of stuff; labelling drawers, putting names on exercise books, trying to remember the French for 'sit down'... the usual. But today was The Day, when I finally assumed the responsibilty for a class full of nine-year-olds. And you know what...? It didn't go too badly at all. While I am not exactly the most useful person to have about the class in a teaching capacity at the moment, the teacher I'm learning from/with has a bit of technofear, so loves the fact that I can actually work the Interactive Whiteboard or set up a projector. It's so nice being in a place of work that I'm wanted at, and that I want to be at. First time in a long time, I can tell you.

I have the usual suspects in my class. The boys who you know will be fighting off the girls in a few years, but will unfortunately still be as dumb as a bag of hammers (yet will get away with it his entire life!). The SEN (Special Educational Needs) kids who you can't help but root for because they try so damn hard. The class joker. The scarily hyper-intelligent girls (we have loads of them). I like just walking around the class, seeing who needs a hand with stuff, answering questions and such. I even did a bit of talking in front of the whole class today, presenting some stuff on Charles Dickens! Right in at the deep end. Brilliant. AND they gave me a laptop. DVDs and interwebs in bed! It's like heaven!

I feel, for once, like I'm in the right place. Here's hoping it'll continue.

Paraiso

2006-09-01T19:18:00.000-01:00

Stan Chow is one of the greatest illustrators about at the moment - and after many years of bugging the hell out of him, he's finally come up trumps and given me one of his pieces. One of the perks of friendship! It's truly lovely, and will be gracing my living room wall as of tomorrow, when I can get to B&Q and learn how to put pictures up. It's huge too, about four feet tall and three feet across. Aaaaand... here it is!

Heeeee! I now officially own 'art'!

Returning

2006-08-31T11:37:00.000-01:00

My American Odyssey is over, and I have come home, back to the same old same old. After nearly two weeks of what can only be described as a splendid time, reality has kicked in once more. I feel relaxed, which was the point of the exercise, but I also miss being in sunny Dallas already. My time there was probably the happiest I've been in a long time... being so far away from the usual day-to-day rumblings of life is a most agreeable situation - plus being in the company of The American always brings a smile to my face. I will return soon. It's already been decided. Just got to get the first term of school and the new job out of the way, and I'll be back flying over the Atlantic again. I can't wait.

The journey back was alright. I was feeling pretty down after saying goodbye - from being incredibly happy to utterly miserable in the space of a couple of hours... great! As usual, my inability to sleep while on a moving vehicle kicked in, so while I had the space to relax (the plane was barely half full, so everyone got to stretch out across seats) I couldn't drop off. I watched Mission Impossible 3, which was *meh* - though Simon Pegg was in it, which raised a smile, read, listened to music, just killing time. The now anthemic "Transatlanticism" by Death Cab For Cutie raised a few sniffles. The lyrics took on an awful level of meaning, and the combination of being tired and some overwhelming emotion hit me pretty hard. Depressed michael was back with a vengence, swiftly accompanied by the angry version when my mother - who was meant to meet me at the airport - sent me a message saying she'd slept in, and the train home was my only option. Across London, in rush hour, with a suitcase and a heavy box full of sweets and snacks the size of a small nation. Damn my love of Mountain Dew. Eventually got back home four hours after leaving the airport, collapsed into bed, and woke after a solid 16 hours of sleep. Brilliant.

Anyway, I'm now back, jetlag seems to have dissipated, and I'm trying to get ready for Monday and The New Job. I'm finishing off a few jobs around the house as I really won't have time soon. In fact, I have been most masculine today and built two walls - one in the garden, and one out in front of the house. They're not the most professional looking things, but they seem sturdy enough and hopefully won't fall over at the slightest breeze. As long as the local feline population don't just see them as new climbing frames, all should be well. I may even get around to painting the last bedroom over the weekend, then all will be complete. Shocking.

Snakes

2006-08-18T15:01:00.000-01:00

Snakes on a Plane. The stupidest title for a movie ever. It's preposterous tripe. It's cliche ridden. It's got about 1.7 million completely gratuitous 'eeeeeew!' moments. It has completely unnecessary nudity. The script basically sucks. The plot is full of holes. The acting is alright at best. It should be an absolute turkey...

...but it's actually one of the Greatest Movies Ever. Not 'Best Films Ever' - there's a major difference between Movies and Films. Films are works of art, classic pieces of cinematography like Dr Strangelove, Battle Royale (sorry, I like it!), Gone With The Wind. Movies are the things you can go watch, get a bucket of fizzy pop and a wheelbarrow of popcorn, switch off your brain and just enjoy the damn thing. See the works of people such as Adam Sandler and Will Ferrell for perfect examples. Snakes on a Plane is just amazing - and everything mentioned up there in the first paragraph is not a criticism, it's actually a celebration of plain ol' dumbness. Go see it, because you'll fully love it.

I may be slightly skewed in my opinion as the audience I watched it with were totally up for it. The crowd were completely different to anything I've experienced back home, applauding, shouting, shrieking. Hell, they even howled in appreciation when the title of the movie came up. This is how movies should be watched. Fully aces. People of the UK, take a lesson from your American brethren, and lighten up a bit when you go to the cinema. You've paid your money, so enjoy yourselves. It's a celebration!

Transatlanticism

2006-08-17T14:38:00.000-01:00

A big update, I think. There has been big events.

The last few weeks have been curious. Lots of not much is the best way to describe it, I suppose - hanging out around the house, catching up with a backlog of 360 games (I forgot how good Tomb Raider can actually be!), reading huge amounts of stuff for school, and generally trying to concentrate on making myself - for want of a much better word - 'better'.

Still taking the tablets, which is going OK. Still the odd day of horribleness, but nothing that can't be dealt with. I've also had my first therapist session which was... interesting. I have issues with talking about stuff with people I don't know - hell, I find it hard enough talking to people I know about how I feel - but she made me feel very comfortable, and we just... talked. I've another appointment after I return to the UK, so I'll go into it a bit further then, but it's certainly a different experience. The short version of Appointment #1 was 'michael needs to think about michael more', which leads me to where I'm sitting now...

Yup - here I am in the USA. Never been to the States before, but... well... I wanted a break before I start on the Teaching course, and couldn't think of anywhere I'd sooner be (and anyone I'd sooner be with). I'm staying in Dallas with The American (and her cat!) for just under two weeks of silliness, relaxing and meeting lovely new people. I've been planning on coming out to visit for quite a while, but it's only been over the last few weeks that everything has come together to make the trip possible. A few clicks on a mouse, making sure that flights were available, and boom - tickets are organised, insurance sorted, bus journey to the airport dealt with. All of a sudden, it's yesterday morning and I'm standing in Gatwick Airport with my suitcase and passport, ready to fly across the planet.

The journey was alright. Cattle class on Delta isn't the most comfortable, but the ticket wasn't too expensive, so I didn't mind. My travel buddies were fun, two girls on their way to Ecuador for four months (!), which we celebrated with Bloody Mary's for breakfast. The movies sucked (aside from 'Sneakers' oddly - the oldest film on offer was the best, though it's all about hacking and codes, so of course I'd like it). We were about an hour late leaving Gatwick though, so I missed my connecting flight in Altanta, Georgia. Mercifully my panic was allayed by the strange accented people at the airport -who all seemed to call me 'mayne' which made me grin - and they rebooked me onto one an hour or so afterwards. The second flight (Atlanta to Dallas Fort Worth) was much more comfortable, even though it was little more than a flying bus for businessmen. I got a window seat this time (aisle on the 777, fyi) and spent the flight gazing out the window at the clouds listening to my MP3 player. Stuff like Sigur Ros, Camera Obscura, Death Cab for Cutie and the like - nice and dreamy, perfect for 36000 feet. We were diverted around a huge thunderstorm which was incredible to watch from above, the clouds swirling about, the lightning strkes... amazing. It was then I realised that I'd never actually been on a journey like this before. Sure, I've flown to Ireland and stuff, but never off to another continent.

New adventure, new start. And most of all, new michael.

Sun Hits The Sky

2006-08-02T19:20:00.000-01:00

Freedom! Sweet, glorious freedom!

Ladies and gentlefolk, my mission to get sacked from my job has been a successful one. The campaign of random non-attendance coupled with a complete inability to do the latest iteration of my job-spec has led to the Holy Grail I sought - 4 weeks paid leave and the termination of my contract. As of today, I am the world's happiest unemployed person! I may just eat crisps for the next four weeks, and possibly grow a beard. I can sit in the pub at lunchtime, knowing that in a few weeks I actually have a job I will enjoy doing to look forward to. And all the while, I'm still getting paid. That, my friends, is a winner. This is The Good Life.

Let us celebrate this joyous day with the following two fantastic songs. Download them, buy them, watch the videos, whatever. Just enjoy!

1. CSS - "Let's Make Love": Dammit, this is the stuff. A Brazilian band signed to Sub Pop? If there was ever cause for a WTF, that'd be it. CSS stands for Cansei de Ser Sexy (which means "Tired of being sexy", Portuguese translation fans!) and this song DIVIDES people. Some hate it, some adore it, worship it, and mop up the tears it makes them cry with handwoven silk handkerchiefs. This is a mark of TASTE. This is what I'd do if I had some. Check the video here.

2. The Walkmen - "The Rat": Shouty. Angry. Just plain dirty music. I want to scream the lyrics from tall buildings. Shockingly sexy use of minor chords. It's getting a *proper* release here in the UK soon, I think, but the song's been around for a year or so. The simple and understated video is here for you to witness. Watch and you'll see what I mean.

Right, let the beard growing... Begin!!

London Calling

2006-08-01T13:25:00.000-01:00

Well, that was fun!

The fourth wave of cards has been unleashed on the great unwashed, beer has been drunk, and I've completely spazzed my back. One of these incidents is (probably) unrelated to the others, but here's the report anyway. Ow.

Pretty much spent all of yesterday in London, wandering around after meeting my mother for lunch, killing time. I think I may well have had a drink in pretty much every bar in the whole area (or it felt like it anyhow) but at least if I ever go back, I know where every single bar, cafe, coffee house and licensed sex shop is. After 4 hours of strolling about, these kind of things get imprinted on your mind, y'know. Met up with a few of the lovely Mind Candy lot in Borders, where Dr Paul presented me with a little file of my designs AND some promo cards, including The Illustrious Gold Card That Everybody Wants. After making a few calls from a payphone in which someone had actually done a poo (it was there in the corner, but no other ones worked, and no, T Mobile STILL haven't sent me my replacement phone), I positioned myself outside The French House and waited. The French (as it is lovingly known) is one of my favourite places in all of London. Absolutely tiny, been there for years, and home to some very strange and wonderful people. You can wander in not knowing anyone, any time of the day, and you'll get dragged into a random conversation. My kind of place. Also, the world's greatest playwright Brendan Behan used to drink there, which is invariably a mark of quality.

Ben was first to arrive, followed by Dave Sledge and swiftly after, Jamie and Sara. We headed down Old Compton Street to our second meeting place, The Stockpot, for food. People mock me for having pancakes and ice cream for dinner, but meh - I'm living basically on sugar at the minute, so I don't mind. Plus if Americans can have pancakes for breakfast, who am I to quibble over timezones? European Chris then showed up, ordering a plate of offal, and we were finally joined by the last of our team (Marc) who got shockingly lost. Then it was on to Borders again (just round the corner) where the madness ensued. MC were running a couple of competitions at the venue - one which was solving a bunch of Wave 4 cards that had been blown up to poster size, the other a team competition solving puzzles that flashed up on a screen. A group of us did our best to put people off (cheering when question 69 came up went down particularly well), but needless to say, I / we didn't win. But I don't mind, because I had my Gold Card, which certain obsessive loons were eyeing up scarily. I swear, if I'd been there on my own, they'd have tried to pick me off like a pride of boggly eyed lions against a puzzle designing gazelle. I leapt over the rack of jazz CDs and fled into the distance for a swapping session and general chat with lots of lovely people I'd not met before. Card collections were augmented - one guy I met actually has every single card which I found scary - and stories were told. Then it was back into Soho to a bar called 6 Degrees for a few drinks on the MC tab. Needless to say it was decimated quite quickly, and time passed most speedily as I talked to what felt like pretty much the whole world. Come 11pm I decided it was hometime, so I did the huge round of goodbyes, coralled Jamie and Sara (and eventually a few others) off to the station, finally rolling in home around 12.30pm. So, a good night was had by all.

Oh, and the back? Well, this afternoon I was just heading out to the post office, picked up my bag and felt the damn thing go ping. I collapsed to the floor like a ragdoll, whimpering like an idiot for about ten minutes. The pain has subsided a bit - and I still managed to get into the village and back - but now it's a dull throb. Don't want to move that much, because even breathing hurts. Booo say I.

Boy vs Girl

2006-07-30T19:31:00.000-01:00

Oooh, been a while since last posting, but there's not much going on at the moment... This is only a brief update until tomorrow, when I'll actually have some news - it's the launch of Perplex City's fourth wave of cards which include a barrage of my deranged ideas, and a leeeetle launch soiree takes place down in That London which I shall be attending (of course) with the great and the good. News spews and dummyspits as and when they happen!

I'm heading down in the morning to meet my mother, which will be interesting in itself, then do some major hanging around until hooking up with the various good people. Speaking of whom, one (Jamie) recommended the rather fabulous Questionable Content comic strip to me last week (www.questionablecontent.net) and I have fallen for it in a major way. Basically it's the comings and goings of a group of normal people like thee and me (hah!) who may possibly have a few issues... it's probably better if you go read it. It won't disappoint. :D

Anyway, in tribute, I have made a shirt based on one of the characters . Turned out pretty well, I think:

It's NOT Pintsize, it's merely... inspired by him. I didn't have the right colours in the first place, but I still think it looks quite splendid. And I'll buy a few of the official (and pretty!) QC shirts when payday rolls around again. Toodles!

mx
mx

School's out!

2006-07-20T13:16:00.000-01:00

Good lord, busy busy busy. So much to do and so little time, as the white rabbit said.

It has been a few days of ups and downs. No middle ground for me - just either splendidly good things (spending my first day at school as a *proper* trainee and meeting my class for next year, for example) and stinky rotten things (bike playing up again, and losing my bloody mobile phone). Let the ranting begin!

Well, school was fun. The new class are coming into year five, and are all very small. Seriously. I feel like I tower over them like the BFG, plus they were all timid and scared of me - that'll change quickly enough, I'm sure. I'm back in tomorrow to set up the classroom for the First Day Of Term and begin the horrors of actually planning stuff for them to do. This is where the whole "new career" actually begins, and though it feels daunting I'm also excited...

On the crappier side, The Pig required a new battery after numerous AA visits this week. Mercifully I've taken today off for a day of what The American refers to as "Domestic Productivity" but it's start was somewhat delayed by me having to go and spend £45 (£45!) on a box of acid. Still, I shall fit it later and all - hopefully - will be well with it again. However, at some point while hurtling around the local area, my mobile slipped out of my pocket, never to be seen again. All my numbers are lost, of course, which is a bit annoying, but there's precious little I can do about that. Just have to send a few emails out. The worst thing is that my network take up to a week to replace the thing. What will I do?!

Actually, it'll probably be rather nice.

Other news... not much. Some of my designs for Perplex City's Wave 4 cards will be available as of the 31st, and there's a launch party down in That London that I shall be heading for (along with, no doubt, the usual suspects). There is talk of pre-event cocktails, and where there is the possibility of a Mojito and a good quality Bloody Mary, you'll find me...

Be good. See you soon.

Life is a Cabaret, Old Chum...

2006-07-12T15:39:00.000-01:00

No updates for a while, mainly as not much is actually happening. Life has slowed to a crawl, with the daily machinations of getting up, going to work, going home, eating and sleeping (then starting all over again) becoming increasingly unbearable. Lots and lots of hitting my head off the desk...

Work has hit crisis point. Basically it's become a bitter parody of Office Space (which I finally managed to watch at the weekend. It's very good, go watch it... it'll give you a lot to think about, especially on the role of slacking in the workplace). Anyway, I now officially no longer give a damn about anything contained within my work remit, mainly as (yet again) my job spec has been altered into something unrecognisable from it's previous incarnation. The details of my old job are dull in the extreme, but safe to say, I was alright at it, and every day from 8.30am to 5pm I'd trundle along, doing my thing and not feel too bad when I got home.

Now it's all different. My old job has been taken over by an already overstretched manager, while I haven't got even the most basic idea about my new role. I've asked people to help, to point me in the right direction... even to just plain tell me what I have to do, but I'm met with nothing more than a shrug of the shoulders and a slack-jawed "dunno...". Hence the almost continual face/desk interface. Seriously, my forehead is bruised as all hell. I've just been told that next week my hours will be changing too - without consultation - which adds yet another straw to the heavily-laden camel's back. I'd check my contract, but I don't actually have one. Indeed, I never have! What a splendid company I work for.

But, of course, there's the fabled light at the end of the tunnel; Man's most liberating action. The Handing In Of Your Resignation. In a mere two weeks, I shall give my Four Weeks Notice in, and the countdown to my new life will begin. Believe me, I'm counting the nanoseconds. And when that four weeks is up, I'm going straight to the pub for a whole week to celebrate.

In Real Life - like I said, not much occurring. Finished JPod (which I enjoyed immensely) and have now moved onto Battle Royal. Next on the list is the new Haruki Murakami offering, "Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman". Finally got the new Snow Patrol CD, also quite lovely (especially the new single, "Chasing Cars"). And I'm going out for Japanese food tonight! I tell you. it's a rollercoaster, this life.

I can't stand the rain...

2006-07-04T19:00:00.000-01:00

Today I was properly scared for the first time in a long time. Sure, the odd spider crossing my desk puts a shiver up my spine once in a while, and I'm not too great when it comes to heights, but today... For about 25 minutes, today was absolutely horrible.

A little scene setting, if you please. I've never learnt to drive a car, mainly as I've never had to. Always lived in places with a good public transport set-up (London, Manchester, Sydney, etc.), but then I moved to Woburn Sands, a small town in Buckinghamshire. There are 4 buses a day, and a hideously overpriced and overcomplicated train station - that's it - and after relying on them for nearly a year (and them not aften appearing), I took matters into my own hands... and bought me a little scooter.

Sure, it's not exactly the most masculine thing in the world, but it's mine, and it gets me around. It's a 125cc Suzuki, and is affectionately known as The Pig - mainly as it squeals like one when going up a steep hill. I learnt how to ride it safely, took my lessons, and now love pootling off around on it. Great. Apart from when, of course, it rains...

Now, around last September, I got caught in a terrible storm. One of those where you just become saturated, and you seriously believe that there's no way you can get any wetter. Then you shift your position ever so slightly, revealing a previously hidden fragment of dry cloth to the elements which immediately shlurps up another three litres of rain. To add insult to injury, it had been a lovely morning, with no sign of rain, so I was wearing no waterproof gear at all. Add on top of that the fact that I was on my way to work, and had to spend the day in sopping wet clothes and... well, again, great. That wasn't the worst thing though. Oh no. The gods thought it would be a lovely time to have michael involved with his first bike accident!

Cheers lads. Ta. No, seriously. Thanks very much.

It wasn't bad at all, to be honest. Wasn't seriously hurt, and I insist I was being careful anyway. I was going slowly round a corner when, all of a sudden, I hit a patch of water and the back wheel went whoomph from under me, swiftly followed by the rest of the bike. The first I knew about it was waking up laying face down in a puddle, looking up and seeing the bike about thirty feet away with the wheels still spinning... I scrambled to my feet, picked the bike up and rode the remaining couple of miles to work, and had a crappy day explaining to idiots that yes, I got caught in the storm, and I had a ripped shirt and couldn't walk straight because I'd fallen off the bike.

Anyway, that was the first and only time I've come off. But today, about 4pm (while I was actually doing some work for once...) the rains returned. In style. I was - of course - hoping it would pass quickly, but come hometime there was no sign of it abating. And there's no way that I was going to stay in the office a minute longer than necessary, so I decided to take a chance of go for it.

Got my jacket, helmet and gloves on, popped one headphone of the iPod in, stepped outside and immediately became 99.4% water. I fiddled for my keys in my pocket, started the bike and set off home - straight into the first thunder and lightning storm of the year. And there were only two things I could think of:

1. PleasepleasepleaseGODdon'tletmybackwheelgoagainIdon'twanttofalloffanddie......
2. I wonder if the lightning will be attracted to me more because I've got my iPod on?

Obviously I can probably warrant number one as I'd fallen of previously in similar conditions, but with regards point two... it strikes me that I was possibly the wettest thing on earth at that point, and I was sitting on a big lump of metal; a combination that would be reasonably good at conducting electricity. Honestly, sometimes I'm a total muppet. Anyhow, through the storm I rode, trying to be safe, attempting to not pay attention to the lightning striking all around. You know that thing when you see the flash and you start counting until you hear the rumble, so you can work out how many mile away it is? Mine went like...

***Flash!***
michael: "On..."
***BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM***

Put the fear in me. I love thunder and lightning - it's one of nature's greatest showpieces - but I would much prefer to be inside, with a cup of tea and a biscuit. Not sitting in soaking clothes atop a super-conductive lump of metal while riding around the hilly countryside. But anyway, the upshot is, I made it home in one piece, and conquered another small fear. I think there'll always be a spot of mild trepidation if I have to venture out again in weather like that (and it'll happen again before the summer's out, I'm sure of it), but now I've managed to get through a journey in it without coming off, it's another mark in the "well done michael" column. Now, excuse me, I'm just off to investigate how much it'll cost if I wanted to learn to drive...

Follow my lead on the 1-2-3...!

2006-06-30T13:28:00.000-01:00

So, after the last rather self-indulgent post - though what this being a blog about my life and stuff in it, it's all self-indulgent, isn't it? - I'm feeling a bit better. A combo of having a few days off and some cracking drugs have seen a lightness in my mood. I haven't actually done that much, but things certainly look a bit brighter for some reason unbeknownst to me...

Anyway - good things! Just a few random splendid things that are making me grin inanely at the moment:

1. The Pipettes - good lord, there's something about this band that make you want to shake your arse. Think the Phil Spector girl-group Wall of Sound combined with... I dunno, absolute filth. Gorgeous harmonies, knowingly saucy lyrics... it's all For The Win. Currently have a new single out called "Pull Shapes", extolling the merits of dancing to whatever you bloody want to. See also "School Uniform" which is just plain dirty. Rawr!

2. Book Shopping - bought two books today, even though I had no intention of doing so. Both oddly have a Japanese theme too - Haruki Murakami's "Dance Dance Dance" and the original novel of one of my favourite films, "Battle Royale" by Koushun Takami. Didn't even know it existed, to be honest, but I shall read it after I'm finished JPod (which is also really good. Though having the author in their own book is slightly weird. Read it yourself and you'll see).

3. Jose Gonzales' cover of Kylie Minogue's "Hand On Your Heart" - not exactly a happy thing per se, but it's both (a) quite beautiful and (b) absolutely stunning. Video's a cracker too.

4. Tea and Cake - specifically Battenburg cake. Pink and yellow, with more marzipan than your average wedding cake. Splendid. Also, never underestimate the power of the humble digestive biscuit. And with my appetite currently at about 10% of what it used to be, my tea consumption has risen greatly.

And that's about it at the moment. Simple pleasures, making little synapses in my head burst with pleasure. Have a lovely weekend, y'all.

Misery Loves Company

2006-06-28T13:37:00.000-01:00

Another rubbish day. Apologies if this starts sounding like something of a blues tune, but sometimes you've got to offload.

Anyway. I woke up this morning (doo-doo-doo-do-doo), and... nothing. Slept OK(ish) and the alarm went off at the normal time. But could I get up? Could I buggery. The Black Dog had well and truly taken up residence in my head, and I was going nowhere. Yes, dear people - it's time to admit: my name is michael, and I suffer from depression. Actually, I've never liked the fact that people "suffer" from it - it just doesn't feel right. I much prefer to say that it's something I have to deal with on a day-to-day basis. Like going to the office (heh!), or cleaning house, but even more rubbish.

It's only recently that I got off my arse and decided that enough was enough, and actually went off to the doctor in a bid to actually get some help. Initially I decided that I'd try the mind over matter approach, and organised some couselling sessions - however, several months down the line, they've still not appeared as there's something of a waiting list (who'd have thought there'd be so many depressed people out there!?). Time went on, I kept on feeling rubbish (thanks to a few events at work and home) so the Big Decision was made. It was time to Go On Drugs.

That was two weeks ago. Escitalopram for breakfast is not exactly the most nutritious thing, but thanks to the Black Dog, I don't actually eat as much as I used to anyway. In fact, I've actually managed to shift a bit of excess tummy thanks to a combo of smaller portions and going out on wistful walks while listening to incredibly loud music, so at least something good has come from this episode. But then there's the other stuff: dealing with your body getting used to the new stream of chemicals that hurtle through your body each morning, the moodswings (like today, when I couldn't face leaving the house), the occasional nausea and - of course - the very messed up sleeping patterns. These are the truly crappy aspects, but hopefully (please!) they'll abate.

So there you go. Today's post has been brought to you by the letters S, S, R and I. And I promise I shan't wibble on about Being Depressed too much in future. Normal(ish) service willl be resumed shortly... unless it gets really bad. ;D

Daysleeper

2006-06-24T21:27:00.000-01:00

Sleep. It's basically all I've done today. I went to bed around midnight last night, woke up about nine this morning. A quick trip to the shop for the usual Saturday morning vitals - milk, bread, newspaper - and I crashed out on the sofa again. Dozed on and off for a few hours, interspersed with occasional moments of actual moving about for necessary sanitation visits and a sandwich, then... yup, slept again. Though I did manage to stay awake for the whole of tonight's Argentina vs Mexico game in the World Cup (which was a cracking match, by the way) I'm bleedin' drowsy again!

Way to spend half your weekend, michael. Round of applause for you there...

Anyhow, I need to beat the sleep monster, so tomorrow will be spent doing proper stuff in the Outside World. There will be walking. There will be lunch in a pub, trying to hold down a broadsheet newspaper while eating a burger with a fork. There will be the watching of more football (England play Ecuador at 4pm). Then (and only then) will I come home. And probably die from exhaustion.

Lazyitis

2006-06-23T12:22:00.001-01:00

Grrrr. I'm angry with myself today. After calling in sick to work yesterday and spending the vast majority of my day in bed (thanks to a combination of both insomnia *and* drowsiness), I got up this morning feeling... not that much better, actually. However, as things usually fall apart at the office if I'm not there for seemingly anything more than an hour, I dragged my sorry self (now with bonus sore throat, so I sound like a raging bear) to work.

This, of course, is always a mistake.

Nothing has been done. I have 200-plus emails. I have 40-odd voicemails. It's almost as if nobody noticed I wasn't actually in... so I check. I speak to The Manager, who is confused. He honestly believes that I was in yesterday. In fact, he talked to me, and I even made him tea, apparently.

Now, either he's been drinking, or I've got a very lazy clone. And if it's the latter, I'm going to find him, and beat hell out of him.

Anyway, I've now been in work for 4 hours, and have *just* finished dealing with all the backlog. Now I can get on with today's work, as long as I can calm down and stop threatening everyone who passes by my desk with random violence. And yes, I still feel rotten. At least there's only a few hours until the weekend begins, which will mainly comprise of sleeping, eating, and watching the football. It's a good plan.

S-H-O-P-P-I-N-G

2006-06-21T19:37:00.001-01:00

The greatest time of the month is upon us - Payday! A little retail therapy never goes amiss, so the last couple of lunchtimes has seen me wander into town at lunchtime to follow my senses and see if anything appeals. Yesterday I finally got round to picking up the new Douglas Coupland novel JPod, under the recommendation of Mr Juxta. Now, normally me and the works of Coupland do not get on. I find him a little too straining, constantly trying to be cool just for the sake of it (a problem I also have with Bret Easton Ellis, but meh...). However, I found his previous dive into the world of geekdom - "Microserfs" - was splendid stuff, and I've been told that JPod is of a similar ilk. Looking forward to it. Didn't pick up the limited edition version - even though I wanted it - as there was no way I could justify spending twice the money the regular one costs just so I could get a random little toy Qube fellow. I have more than enough tat all about the house, thankyouverymuch.

Also - finally! - got round to buying the "Clerks X" 3-DVD set. Only had it on video, and that's been worn to skinny ribbons after weekly viewings since pretty much the beginning of time. Seriously, if you've never seen it - GO BUY IT NOW. It's 100% The Greatest Film Ever Made. Even just reading the script is arse-quakingly funny, and the boxset I got today has *everything*. Alternate cut of the film, documentaries, out-takes, music videos... bloomin' loads. I'll probably spend a whole weekend watching the thing, if I ever get a free one again.

Last but certainly not least; my final purchase was Death Cab for Cutie's fine album "Transatlaticism". I bought their latest offering ("Plans") on the strength of hearing one track in a random record shop in Brighton a few months back, insisting to my friend Jo that "once in a while you must take a chance on something you find immediately beauitiful". While she scoffed, I am pleased to report that Plans was beyond wonderful and is often played loudly here at Idle Towers. However, The American was aghast that I'd not even heard "Transatlanticism", and demanded I get it as soon as possible following her recent visit. Hell, I didn't even know that DCfC was basically The Postal Service (I can often fall woefully behind the times in music, but soon catch up). Anyway, I heeded her advice, and will post impressions on it soon. If it's half as good as the other one - and The American insists it blows "Plans" out of the water - it'll be fully aces.

So there you go, three different media, and all great. I'm brilliant at shopping, me.

Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want

2006-06-19T07:21:00.000-01:00

This is, at the moment, my favourite painting ever. Suerat's "Un dimanche après-midi à l'Ile de la Grande Jatte" is a work of pointillism, created using thousands upon thousands of teeny dots.

If you look really close-up at it, everything disappears, blurs out. Pull back and the image reforms. It's really quite lovely, and took two years to paint it. The picture has been in residence at the Art Institue of Chicago for many years, and is (oddly enough) featured in the film Ferris Bueller's Day Off. One day I'll get to see it for real.

Top of the Pops

2006-06-18T21:08:00.000-01:00

Music! It makes the people come together - it makes the bourgeoisie and the rebel.

The UK singles chart is an organic beast, and something that I have loved deeply since I was a little idlemichael. Holding a tapedeck next to a transistor radio copying the songs on a Sunday evening (or lunchtime if I was in Ireland) so I had stuff to listen to for the next week. Obviously now I'm older I can afford to buy music *ahem*, and my tastes have widened to lots of different genres and stuff. While I will always have a place in my heart for whining guitars, wistful indie boys singing of lost love and the odd thundering drum solo, there is also a small part of me that clamours for the latest offering that the world of Pop presents for our delight.

Currently at number one in the UK (for the second week) is Nelly Furtado, with "Maneater" - not a cover of the Hall and Oates classic. Nelly used to be like a bird; now she is like Courtney Cox crossed with a lapdancer. Seriously, this is one hell of a makeover from the slightly rubbish folky crap she used to do. The song's produced by Timbaland, who in between making shoes actually comes up with some great work. The vocals are a bit nasal, but still work well - but the real power is the bassline. It makes you want to shake your arse bigstyle, and that's a Good Thing.

Shakira (featuring Wyclef Jean, who was a Fugee) is our highest new entry for the week, with "Hips Don't Lie". Having not heard this song, I can only assume its about transexuals, and people pointing out men pretending to be lades who can't be ladies because they are too thin and hips don't lie. See? That's the kind of song that should be in the top 10.

The Automatic's "Monster" is at number four. It is a wonderful song, and we'll all be sick to death of it by the end of the summer. Until then, however, enjoy it, and campaign to make it the new Welsh National Anthem. Bon Jovi are at five with some dreary shite that kept me awake last weekend because they were playing live down the road VERY LOUDLY. They've done nothing good since "Livin' On A Prayer"! Who keeps buying this?!

"Paris To Berlin" is by Infernal, and is in at six, like an old woman from the supermarket. And it is fucking shit. And yet people love it. It confuses me, though I'd have probably danced my ass off to worse stuff when I was young and bangin'. Ahem. The rest of the top ten is pretty much football songs to celebrate the World Cup, the only good one being the Lightning Seeds' "Three Lions", which seems to have been reissued every two years since 1834. Still good to sing when drunk though. And I do hope England win their group.

Outside of the Top Ten (which is pretty much ALL THAT MATTERS) Brittany Murphy has a song with Paul Oakenfold called "Faster Kill Pussycat" at 13, which I rather like. Actor / music crossovers are usually doomed to disaster, but this is actually rather splendid. A real doof-doof stomper of a tune, and the video is very shiny. This appeals to my magpie-like tendencies, and I am hypnotised when it comes on the music channels on the telly. Very good. 8/10.

There's also Primal Scream's "Country Girl" (23) which really should be The Big Summer Tune at all of the festivals. It's AMAZING, completely ridiculous, very shouty and just about perfect. It's got all the fun and games of stuff they did years ago like "Jailbird" and "Rocks", but without any of the "desperately trying to sound like The Black Crowes" rubbish. They have grown up, and fair play to them. Meanwhile, the rest of the Top 40 is actually pretty dull - mainly as summer's a dire time to release new stuff - aside from Eurovision winners Lordi, who's "Hard Rock Hallelujah" is hanging on at 36. Everything else is either a very poor football song, a reissue (Armand van Helden's "My My My" for the umpteenth time, anyone?) or has been around since the beginning of time and we're bored of it. Stand up "Dani California" and the Red Hot Chili Peppers! Bah.

Ahhhh, the charts. I remember a time when I'd only pay attention to everything outside of the Top 20, because everything Up There was a sell out. I was young and naive. I'm sorry. And now I'll shut up. Toodles til next time.

La la la lala la la laaa la la la...

2006-06-16T21:41:00.000-01:00

...everybody loves Katamari Damacy!

Hangin' on the Telephone

2006-06-16T21:35:00.000-01:00

So, my usual messing about on the Interwebs at work (basically the one perk of my current position is that I've got full net access, which I abuse to the fullest as a means of killing time) led me to the lovely image you see above. Apparently, this is a conceptual future comms device, designed by some Swedish Uni students under the instruction of Nokia, the mobile phone company. You wear it as a necklace - most appealing to me, as the few pieces of jewellery I own are made of plastic - and each thingy represents a person. Squeeze said thingy, and you'll call them up. Apparently it takes all of the hassle out of *sigh* actually dialling someone's number in order to speak with them. Still, it's a pretty whizzy idea, so sign me up. I like the idea of wandering around with little plastic toys in your pocket or bag, and handing them out to nice people. Though my one would be rather sparse, as I can be a right miserable bugger...

Everything In It's Right Place

2006-06-16T13:11:00.000-01:00

The American is a good person. She knows the value of a rousing national anthem, appreciates that everything isn't always that the world portrays, and also the necessity of having a good pen about your person at all times. She is well travelled, and seemingly can talk to the animals. These are impressive qualities. I'm thankful that she's about.

The American came to visit a bunch of us last weekend - literally just for the weekend, and a stunningly fun time was had by all - and came armed with goodies. Ohhhhh, such wondrous stuff - bottles of Mountain Dew, a Mr Happy cooling pack (my obsession with cartoons and stuff will be well noted as time passes) and The Ultimate Sweet. The American brought Jolly Ranchers.

We used to have them over here many years ago. Now, whether they were removed from UK shelves because they weren't popular enough, or were just plain filled with too many e-numbers and artificial things, who knows? All I care about is that they still taste amazing. I may have to harrass her into a regular delivery. Anyhow, see...

...they even LOOK bad for you. Food should not be so brightly coloured. But they are amazing. They taste exactly how they're meant to - even though I've never seen a blue raspberry in real life - with top marks going to the Cherry and Watermelon ones. Ultimate respect goes to Grape flavour, as there is nothing on earth tastier than American Grape Flavor (please note also; correct contextual spelling). Apparently they're available in That London at CyberCandy - http://www.cybercandy.co.uk - but I've still got one and a half giant bags to work through before I need to go fetch more. Thank you, The American!

[introduction]

2006-06-15T21:20:00.001-01:00

Well, here we are... welcome. Wipe your feet.

This is my blog - though actually it's a second attempt at creating and running one. The v1.0 blog ran into... difficulties. Extenuating circumstances meant the poor bugger had to be put to sleep, so never will you be subjected to the thrill-ride that was me eating fish for the first time (which was actually a rather odd thing for someone who's *ahem* quite old). Maybe I'll recount it in a fit of mania at some point.

Anyhow, hello, pleasure to have you here. A few details. My name is michael - which for some reason lost in the mists of time I always write with a lower case "m". I am 30. I try and keep myself to myself wherever possible, and if they were Olympic sports could probably represent my home nation (Ireland, for the record) in both Lurking and Hanging Out. It's a hard life, but such is the way.

I read, I write, I design puzzles, I play games, I listen to lots of verrry random music, and I (like most of the rest of the planet) dislike my job (Let the bitching and stuff commence!). I am, however, managing to do something about my current employment status - I begin training to be a Primary School Teacher this forthcoming September. It'll be like Kindergarten Cop, but with less guns and more whiny guitar music.

So, there's post #1. Hopefully the first of many, and I swear to keep this reasonably regularly updated. Oh, and I also hold up John Allison's promise (from www.scarygoround.com - well worth a visit!) - Never will I tell you what I ate for dinner.

michael