Everything

Thursday, December 21, 2006

One down, Two to go...

And there it is - one whole term as a teacher completed. I am shocked as to where it's all gone, pleased to note that I have survived it, and amazed to see that I feel I have... I dunno... changed, I think. I feel a lot more confident in my abilities, which is a quite obvious thing to state. When the term started I'd had very little experience of teaching, while now I can happily stand in front of a class and freestyle for an hour on several random subjects. I am happier in myself, even though I am still prone to the usual days when the big black dog comes to call.

Best of all, I can handle groups of people (especially strangers) much better than I used to be able to, which is probably the thing I am most pleased about. The past couple of years have seen me - for no reason I can fathom myself - become even more intoverted than I was before. My self belief shrank to virtually nothing, but now... I feel like it's coming back - even if it's only in tiny steps. But tiny steps are a good start.

There are still a few things to deal with. I still can't take praise from most people. My head teacher insists that I am an asset to the school, but I still think I'm just a doofus who shows up every morning, messes about, and somehow still manages to get called a teacher. The kids (not just in my class) were up in arms that I wouldn't be back until after next half-term as I am apparently "The Best Teacher In School" (according to my new mug one of them got me for Christmukkah). Most people would say "Yay for me", but I just want to run to the nearest corner... like I say, something to deal with - and there's still two terms to get that sorted.

As for now though, it's time to let my brain relax and do nothing for a couple of weeks. A few games, a bunch of movies, plenty of food, and the odd curmudgeonly roar of "Bah, Humbug". Compliments of the season, lovely readers. See you after Turkey Day.

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